This lesson really hit me (like knocked the wind out of me). Fear of failure is huge for me. I have a successful career and with an easy flight path to retirement. But it is not enough for my soul, there are glimpses and moments of real creative engagement but it is not my day to day. I have come close several times to trying something new but fear always creeps in with “What if you don’t like this new job any better?”, “It won’t be as stable as your current job.”, “What if you fail, how will you take care of your daughter?”, “You should be thankful that you have as good of a job as you do.” Its hard to move past. I play mind games with myself like trying to find or make moments of joy during the day, looking for the light at the end of the tunnel (retirement), thinking of ways to work in more of the moments I do enjoy, finding gratitude for the things my job offers (vacation, sick days, health insurance). It is hard to look at fear and decide to do something different about it. I am certain that with effort I can find a different path by making small changes and pursuing my interests outside of work in hopes that someday they will become more. I feel like being apart of this mentorship is pushing me to connect with my emotions, recognize the fear and this is the first step to gaining clarity on where I really need to be.
I love this meditation! Breathwork is very necessary for me as is constant, present moment, mindful breathing. It is keeping me off oxygen after being on it for a long time. I love the music as well…As always…Thank you Dakota…for my very breath and mindfulness…so much more. Aho!
Loved this meditation. I not only ignited the fire, I danced around it and became it….. fabulous.
Oh man, just reading the packet brought me to tears. I’m looking forward to this week very much and feel the fear rise yet it’s the excited, let’s go there, fear. I’ve often said over the past couple years that I long to feel alive. It used to be my mantra. My dad died on his 38th birthday from cancer, a week before I turned 18. When I left my husband in 2006, that journey brought me back to myself. I was steeped in self-love and self-care as well as a passion for life. Over the last 13 years – through my daughters walk with addiction, chronic back pain, and other life circumstances I’ve found myself back in this place of wantining to come home again and feel alive.
ps~ I so resonated with Brooke on the week 2 call (watched/listened to recording). I too have been feeling numb. I so appreciate the calls and medicine/resources received from others sharing. When you walked Brooke through her childhood experience I too began to feel emotion along with Brooke and Betty. It feels good to feel.
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