You cannot view this unit as you're not logged in yet.
Events Calendar
| M | T | W | T | F | S | S |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
27
|
29
|
30
|
1
|
2
|
3
|
|
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
|
11
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
|
|
18
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
|
|
25
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
31
|
|
Tue
12
Insight Timer Meditation – 3pm
July 12 @ 3:00 pm - 4:30 pm EDT
Tue
19
Insight Timer Meditation – 7pm
July 19 @ 7:00 pm - 8:30 pm EDT
Tue
26
Insight Timer Meditation – 3pm
July 26 @ 3:00 pm - 4:30 pm EDT
I take strong antidepressants and an anti-psychotic. I have been taking them for almost 40 years and my doctor says they are chemically hardwired into my brain after many attempts to stop them or even change to modern pills. I learned to cry again by watching really sad movies. Now 20 years later I cry over everything sweet or sad with no effort. I took myself to a Zen Center that had a realized teacher and sat zazen for innumerable hours for 12 years which taught me much. I became too disabled and old to go, so have expanded to many teachers of many different sorts. I usually listen to Dakota most of the time and Mooji every day too. You just have to work harder to feel on medication. It’s all in there waiting. Joy is in there too. Nobody give up. Awareness has always been what you are, pills or not.
I thought I knew who I was but listening to this week’s teaching has brought a lot of the old fears and sadness back. I know why I am like I am because I was stupid enough to stay on the medication I still take today. It has dulled my emotions way past the point of calming me down. I feel nothing, when family members or friends etc die I can’t cry, I feel sad for a brief period of time and then nothing. It is my fault, all of this is my fault because of those stupid pills.
Remember, curiosity without judgement … you have grown and evolved so much from the time I have known you. Be patient, gentle, forgiving ….