1. Joy Little Mountain Cloud Richards 4 years ago

    Things definitely moved this last year.
    My sibling, at arms length, that feels so empowering!

    New friends in the map now, that feels good, feel I got support now, not struggling blindly on my own. That’s been magical, the people here, I feel truly blest, I pray I get to meet quiet a few in person, that’s on my wish list…

    My two oldest friend, two girls, known since 11. We like chalk and cheese, they keep my grounded. But now, wow, I can talk about Shamanic path, auras etc and they listen, ask few questions, don’t fully understand. I think it’s because I have stepped more into my authentic self, I have gained confidence to share, just be me. We have actually bonded better, they actually are more open to expressing stuff they don’t understand, like sensing energies…rather than dismissing it as weird, they are beginning to open up to the fact that these things are real…

    My partner… well… no idea where to place him on map!
    He’s the white elephant in the room, so to speak!

  2. Jackie Derham 4 years ago

    My relationships shifted quite a lot since I moved 2 years ago. I have 2 people in my inner circle and most others are in my golden circle, some I see more than others. But no one I don’t want to spend time with, I have learnt that the people who I don’t feel good being with I don’t associate or spend time with anymore, or if they are there in a group I won’t ignore them but also don’t really engage fully.
    My brother and I have always had tension despite working in the family business together for 30 years, but we had a falling out as we were selling it and have not really seen or spoken to each other for the last 6 years and no contact for the last 2. I am fine with that, I did try to make amends at the time, more for my family, but it wasn’t going to work? I am quite different from my brother and sister and my sister drains me a bit but I don’t spend a lot of time with them, they are 3.5 hours away. My mother has dementia and our relationship changed because of that, we had been very close but after my father died she started accusing me of all sorts of things. I love her dearly and call often but we are loosing her.
    I have changed a lot over the last 6 years and I think I choose my “friends” better now.

  3. Christina 4 years ago

    So another year in the West and my relationships have been tested much this year. I have again had to let go of even more family and this has been very hard yet necessary. My boundaries with them have had to be firm and unwavering. It has been a loss with much anger and pain with it. Yet those that are still in my life have been supportive and understanding. It has been challenging for me because when I love someone I tend to love deeply. Family is a huge value to me and yet my actual family is so toxic I have had to re-evaluate what “family” means and let go of the feeling of obligation to my actual family. Dakota… I didn’t see your post last year…. June 29 is my bday… A total moonchild to the fullest!

  4. PhyllisEagleDancing 5 years ago

    My parents are draining. They can’t help it. But I keep my distance and when I visit, I stay for 2 days max. I have to psyche myself up before I visit. Otherwise, the rest of the family is supportive. I have very few close friends. I’d like to find more on this journey.

  5. Marisse Reyes 5 years ago

    I’ve been trying to “get out there” and make some friends and form community here in Amsterdam (I just moved here). So I’ve been making a few acquaintances who meet up every now and then for drinks and dinner. There’s a part of me that wants that safety net of having friends, but inside I’m really uncomfortable because I don’t relate to these people deep down. I went for such a dinner on Wed and I vowed not to meet up with them again. There’s another social tonight, which I decided not to go to. I feel like as I’ve strengthened the relationships in the center of my circle (and to myself), it would be such a disservice to start giving away my energy to people who I know will always be in my outer circle just because I’m afraid of not making friends here in Amsterdam.

    I did this exercise a few months ago and I’m happy to see less people on my outer circle… simply because they don’t take up space in my life anymore. I feel like I’ve become a lot more focused.

  6. Jackie 5 years ago

    Took me a week to finally do this unit…afraid of what I would find, but, as it turns out it was mostly supportive and accepting. The so few people that drained me, were just that, few! Just like in life when something goes wrong, all the focus is on that, and NOT on the hundred billion things that are going right. It is exactly how I felt as I started this unit. It was a super relief to me to see it as it really is. The people that drain me, I tend to keep at arm’s length. I discovered I am pretty good with boundaries.

  7. blpark55 5 years ago

    I am sending this pdf to the print shop so I am able to put pen to paper. I’ll be back with my thoughts.

  8. Hanna Isaksson 5 years ago

    I don’t have that many people around me that drain me today, I make sure to keep a distance if possible. What is sad though is that pretty much my whole family is in the outer circle. I have 3 people in the inner circle (but non of them live in my home town) I only have one in the inner circle with boundaries. I have a lot of people in my golden circle, both privat friends and people from my job. These people are my social world. At home I am usually alone with my dog. So I need to bring someone in to my inner circle with boundaries.

    • Author
      Dakota Walker 5 years ago

      I’ve heard this a few times now that most of the close peeps live far away and are rarely seen. I wonder if this happens when there is a fear of being vulnerable and close? I ask this because the same is true for me as well. Do we keep a safe distance or is it purely coincidental?

  9. HillaryBanksSelf 5 years ago

    This was revealing for me, too. My “closest” relationships live thousands of miles away and I only speak to them for 2-4 hours a month. While the relationships that drain me (work) are getting the majority of my time and attention. I knew this was happening, but quantifying it was almost nauseating. Changes need to be made!

    • Author
      Dakota Walker 5 years ago

      I just commented to Hanna who was saying something similar and I’m wondering why some of us do this (myself included) that the closest people are far away – is it to keep that safe distance or is it truly coincidental?

  10. Christina 5 years ago

    Well, this was very interesting for me. I am quite introverted at times, a total homebody. Like most cancers I enjoy my little shell I have created. In some relationships I saw a tendency to give more than I receive, which I have always struggled with. I have struggled with anxiety my whole life and while I have a good manage of it, doing this exercise I could see how in doing this I may be perhaps draining my hubby and daughter by being short of patience or snippy. I let go of a lot of relationships the past few years and it was a good thing for me, in so doing leaving more room in my life for those who will be more positive. I have always had few people in my inner circle but they are typically strong relationships.

    • Author
      Dakota Walker 5 years ago

      Spoken like a true cancer … when is your birthday? As a cancer myself I relate to what you are describing – few people in the inner circle but are usually strong relationships. And being a homebody. Sounds though, you have done well in cultivating the relationships to weed out the ones that are not serving you.

  11. Joy Little Mountain Richards 5 years ago

    Felt drained after doing this last unit. Think perhaps it was quite sad to realise the good vibes I get from certain folk, I only see them rarely. Whereas the ones that drain me I see more often.
    Feeling a little sad but it will pass I hope..
    Going to have cat nap and listen to some nice music, hopefully feel better afterwards.

    • Author
      Dakota Walker 5 years ago

      I hope you are feeling better since writing this. I think a few have had a similar realization about the distance of the folks we are closest to. Why do you think we keep them so far away? (not logistically, but do we give ourselves more to the relationships furtherest because it may be safer?)

  12. Lee-Ann 5 years ago

    I’m doing so much comparison between the South and the West already with just these few soul work activities. The folks in my circles are already shifting, Some that were in my Inner circle with boundaries have actually shifted out to the golden bubble. I wasn’t expecting to see such a shift that fast as my circles are small to begin with. I know things will change and I’m OK with that. It is a combination of me shifting away from them (realizing my worth) and some of them are also shifting away from me as well. That will just make room for new friends.

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