1. dminer11 4 years ago

    I think I’m finally getting it. Whew, this was a tough one. I was always silenced as a child. In my 33 year marriage when I got angry…I was silenced again. Is it no wonder I have thyroid problems. I overdo learning. I now speak up…then my shadow became respect… or lack of respect for my knowledge. I am such an autodidact. Growing up I was always in accelerated classes in school. Yet never opened my mouth because my mother always told me to shut up and I was stupid. Now I’m in H.S. enrolled in the college course. In my sophomore year my mother went behind my back and enrolled me in the business course. Well into the first quarter.I was devastated. I fought it and went to every administrative person in the school and I was not heard and my mother had control. She decided I would never go to college. I lost all my friends and became very depressed. My mother had no respect for me and had no value for what I was learning. I got though this by going in the back door so to speak or making lemonade. Because of taking typing in the bs. course I was able to apply for an after school job at the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution. Ah…that’s when I realized I had brain… quickly worked myself up to a research assistant and eventually taught grad students in Geology and Geophysics. It was an amazing time. They were going to put me through college…free…I just had to compensate them with work. I was enrolled college and my car was stolen. End of story. That has been my pattern. I go so far and there is a crisis and my earning power ends. Oh this is good…my mother thought women were supposed to take care of the family. That is exactly what I have done all my life. Ok …let’s go take me back …onward soul retrieval. Thank you Dakota.

    • dminer11 4 years ago

      Boy the info just keeps coming. I thought it was proving I was bright at first. Yet I’ve done that over and over again. I am the quintessential overachiever. Same with speaking up.
      However the core problem was a belief I adopted from my mother that women are suppose to take care of family. I’m not even in a journey an I can see an old fashioned movie camera speeding through my life. Witness my life unfold in each frame. This is freaking amazing. The best part after all these years I can finally do something about it. I am so grateful.

  2. Cheyanne 4 years ago

    A part of my shadow is definitely envy. Envious of what others are doing in their lives, where they’re at, their accomplishments…wishing and wondering where my life is going compared to theirs. But over time I’ve learned and accepted that my journey is my own, and I’ve made my own accomplishments. But every now and then I get that tinge of envy when instead I just want to be genuinely happy for them and nothing else.

  3. Joy Little Mountain Richards 5 years ago

    Just wanted to share also, the fretting over money issues…
    What has caused my shadow of anger to grow into overdrive…
    Because I helped my partner and my brother ( now my sister ) out financially years ago, it’s repercussions have been horrendous for me. It’s held me back, money I could really do with having now!
    My partner!
    Has paid me back in instalments, often missed!
    Guess what?
    Somehow he’s always managed to get himself away on holiday though perusing his dreams, motorbikes …ski ing etc etc etc. Whilst I’m at home…
    And my sister , originally my brother, still owes me money that I shall never see!
    It’s help him transform into the beautiful lady she is today, whom I’m so proud of. But she parties now and goes on foreign holidays….
    So, that anger, is now directed towards MY TIME TO PURSUE MY HOPES AND DREAMS and stop fretting over money….they obviously don’t!
    So gratitude to my shadow and these two people……
    It’s empowering me , thank you, the lessons I’ve learnt!
    Never again!

  4. Joy Little Mountain Richards 5 years ago

    Thank you Dakota for sharing your shadow, it’s given me the courage to face mine. Taken me a few weeks to process this all, face it head on!
    Always been ashamed of my anger, can see how now, born out of not being valued as a child, resentments, jealousy…all negative traits started to manifest. No boundaries, low self esteem.
    Harder I tried to keep cap on the anger, the more I exploded. Years of built up hurt only getting released these last several years…
    Deep regrets of words I’ve spoken to others, wish I could take back…
    Years of trying to build self up, get knocked down again, constant cycle.
    Determined to break that cycle now and actually feel I can do it!
    Because the Shamanic path embraces the Shadow, I’m definitely in the right place to work on it!
    Using that energy now,
    For me!
    Propelling self forwards on the wheel and to commit to it, the vision, I bought new iPad. Old one struggling to cope and I’ve not completed one cycle yet! So, I’m ready and rearing to go!
    Work in progress, that was huge step for me, always fretful over money, but now released that fear, and going to be curious and enjoy the new me unfolding..
    To become JOY, my joy, in my life and not just in name…
    Blessings a thousandfold. ❤️❤️

  5. Valerie 5 years ago

    Sometimes I judge people to, it is like a little voice inside my head and when I hear it I try not to listen to it but the damage has allready been done. I realy don’t like to judge people so after this Tiny voice I say to myself to let it go, you don’t know the story why people say Some things or act Some kind of way… and the thing is that beeing affraid of beeing judged is my shadow piece. When someone is beeing judged and I hear it I am the one always saying ” you don’t know their story, so why do you judge” so why do I have this voice in my head that does the judging also. It is like a mirror, judging myself through this little voice. I will do Some more soul recovery

  6. Carol 5 years ago

    I will write more soon but I just had to say IT ALL MAKES SENSE!!!!! I FINALLY KNOW WHY I AM HERE¡!!!!!!!!!!

  7. Hana 5 years ago

    Ahhhh… the bamboo grove… thank you, thank you, thank you… I appreciate so much your effort and getting there again. Love it! It made me really happy!
    It is interesting how much repeated messages I am getting for the soul recovery/retrieval. Feels like something essential to be able to move on. The strongest shadow piece for me right now is very heavy armor and disconnection in that I am not able to receive help, new opportunities and support and it happened somewhere during the strongest IBD episodes in my 20th. I stopped believing my physical body to such an extent that I stopped counting with it in my everyday life. Because I could never be present with others physically in the past and in my everyday life, it brought so much pain and disappointment that I still can´t get over and I rather don´t want to be present then go through the turmoil. This is such a roadblock to me. I reached a point in that I am able to ask for help and accept it even on the emotional level, but the moment the support reach physical level and I am supposed to make physical contact or move myself physically somewhere, travel somewhere etc… I just collapse physically, get really sick and call it all off. I just have so many traumatizing experience from the IBD layered one after another that I still haven´t been able to make it through. I am even scared to travel there and take those pieces back as those were moments of complete loss of dignity and intimacy. I am also angry and frustrated because there is part of me that doesn´t believe that I can ever make a change and live my dreams and this part then shows up as – it works always for everyone but me, poor me. I always have to suffer :-D. This part then usually gets jealous and envious. Third one is so hurt, that it wants to have everything exactly one specific way to protect itself from pain, completely inflexible – it´s my way or highway… Some of them are funny and just need a lot of love, but some of them are real roadblocks. A lot of work for me in the shadows… Thank you!

  8. Heather Thomas 5 years ago

    Timing is a little scary sometimes. Yesterday i had a weird exchange with my boss, communication is poor. I have been trying to fix it, but nothing seems to create change. This was one of the people in the south that i wanted to work with. Anyway I realized yesterday that I was giving my power away. so I was going to ask you all for help taking it back. And you did a whole video on it. thank you. My shadow craves sugar, and now I think that might be a way of filling in the hole giving my power away creates. Just after it happened, I was checking out and grabbed a soda, something i hardly ever allow myself. It was gross, which helped to the realization my shadow feeds on sugar, and that i wasn’t actually treating myself. If it were more of mini soul date I would have gone somewhere to sit down and got something i really enjoy. So much learning. Thanks again

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